Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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