STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
he puts the penis in happiness.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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