I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize