She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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