there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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