You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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