Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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