Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
