Jerry, you need to find god
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
