Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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