What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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