Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Randomize
