Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
