please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Oh god it's open bar.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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