Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
