he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
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