SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
