16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize
