Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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