Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
