he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
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