is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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