I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
