ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
i will never coherently bang her
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
