so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
