Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.