I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
You may now shotgun with the bride
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
You did what with his pubic hair?
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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