i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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