ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
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