No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
His nipple licking is glorious
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