So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
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