I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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