Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Randomize
