Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.