Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
