I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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