this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize
