I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
