Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
