nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
