He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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