Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize