its not stalking. its research.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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