i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize