So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
