I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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