Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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