Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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