please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize