Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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