i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
